


As Certain As The Stars (Remix of 'The Stars Incline Us, They Do Not Bind Us')

by FuryRed



Category: X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies), X-Men (Movieverse), X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern: Still Have Powers, Alternate Universe - Space, Charles Xavier has a Ph.D in Adorable, Dubious Consent, Erik Has Feelings, Hurt/Comfort, Love, M/M, Poor Charles, Protective Erik, Protectiveness, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-15
Updated: 2018-07-15
Packaged: 2019-06-08 11:33:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15242472
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FuryRed/pseuds/FuryRed
Summary: At first, Charles is simply the pilot.Soon, he is the prisoner.Eventually, he is the man Erik loves.





	As Certain As The Stars (Remix of 'The Stars Incline Us, They Do Not Bind Us')

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ikeracity](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ikeracity/gifts), [Pangea](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pangea/gifts).
  * Inspired by [The stars incline us, they do not bind us](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2635184) by [ikeracity](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ikeracity/pseuds/ikeracity), [Pangea](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pangea/pseuds/Pangea). 
  * In response to a prompt by [ikeracity](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ikeracity/pseuds/ikeracity) in the [xmen_remix_madness2018](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/xmen_remix_madness2018) collection. 



> For the X-Men Remix Madness 2018, for the incomparable Ikeracity (and Pangea too!) <3

 

 

At first, he is little more than convenient. A means to an end. Erik's focus is singular, his mindset dedicated to escaping the prison ship and Shaw’s evil clutches, and nothing else. The pilot provides the means. All Erik needs is the opportunity.

So what if Erik has to hurt him? So what if Erik has to use his powers to constrict the metal collar around the telepath's neck, choking him mercilessly and seeing the panic manifest in the pilot's frightened blue eyes? Violence has always been part of Erik's repartee and as such he shows no hesitation when it comes to doing what he has to in order to achieve his goals. But there is a very real difference between using power and pain to control and manipulate the pilot, and doing the kinds of things that are now deemed necessary thanks to Shaw's evil influence.

It should be quite simple- a exercise in mechanics and nothing else. Bodies slotting together like pieces of a puzzle. Pleasure building towards inevitable release. If Shaw wants a show of obedience then Erik will give him one, he will conduct his business behind closed doors so that Shaw can exist in smug satisfaction, knowing that he has forced a situation into being simply as a way of amusing himself. It _should_ be simple, but it isn't, because the pilot is not just the pilot anymore- he is Charles.

At first Charles is quiet but inquisitive. Frightened but brave. He looks at Erik like he is begging not to be mistreated but at the same time is ready to fight Erik with eyes burning bright like blue flame. The first time they sleep together Charles is clearly disgusted- at the situation more than Erik himself, Erik hopes to assume, but he does not beg or plead for an alternative option. Charles accepts his fate like a man waiting to be jettisoned from one of the ship’s airlocks- resigned in defeat, but still very much alive until the moment when the doors are wrenched open. Sometimes Erik wonders if Charles would prefer such a fate- a quick death, rather than a living nightmare. But though the situation becomes increasingly harrowing Charles never once seems like he is close to giving up, and Erik admires his strength of spirit if nothing else.

As the weeks pass Erik watches as the marks he is made to imprint on Charles' skin fade from red to purple to pink, only to be replaced once more as others take their spot. Erik observes as Charles loses weight, as his hair grows, as his eyes become ringed with dark shadows. Erik listens as he and Charles speak more often- exchanging information and amiable conversation each day, feeling more and more like they are speaking because they actually have grown to like each other than simply because they have no choice. At least that’s how Erik feels from his side, but of course he has no way of comprehending Charles’ perception of the matter.

They continue to have sex, and with each encounter Erik finds himself craving Charles' touch- something he is continually denied in spite of the fact that he is inside of Charles every night. Charles does what is necessary to hurry the situation along but any real intimacy is plainly lacking, and it's remarkable how much Erik hates its absence. That much is made clear the first time Erik tries to kiss Charles, when Charles visibly recoils in horror and rapidly crawls out from beneath Erik. Erik stares down at where moments earlier Charles was soft and warm underneath his body, heart pounding and mouth parted in disbelief, and knows then that he can never truly have Charles in the way he increasingly feels like he wants to. And so he instead makes a promise to himself that he will do what he can to protect Charles, and suddenly fleeing the ship alone with little consideration for anyone left behind doesn't seem like the most important thing anymore.

By the time Erik realises he is in love with Charles it is too late. Perhaps if Erik had seen it coming he could have chosen a different path- given Charles away and found some other route off the ship- but deep down Erik knows he could never have done that. Dooming Charles to some sick and debase existence at the hands of Shaw and his cronies is something Erik would not be able to live with, something he wouldn't wish on anyone, and there are so many days when Erik considers pulling the entire ship to pieces, wrenching open airlocks and tearing apart panels of metal so that _no one_ can suffer any longer. More than that Erik wants to find some way to obliterate Shaw, perhaps to take two panels and crush Shaw’s skull between them, bearing down with his powers until Shaw's head bursts, ridding the world of his evil once and for all. But such an act would be risky and reckless, and Erik has been biding his time for far too long now.

As it is Erik waits, continues to sleep with Charles, wishes he could shield him from every terrible thing that is happening, spends more than one night sitting beside where Charles is sleeping in bed, watching over him and murmuring unfulfilled promises to protect. One day Erik stands before Charles in the bathroom and carefully holds his jaw, controlling a razor with his powers as he shaves Charles' face, and Erik feels almost overwhelmed at how he holds something so precious and so special in his hands, his heart clenching painfully as he realises the great measure of trust Charles has chosen to place in him at that moment. The love that Erik feels for Charles is such that it could easily choke him- not physically but literally, stunting his movements and making him falter. Because for the first time in years Erik's focus is not singular and resolute, it is not constant, it shifts and revolves and changes into something new, and ultimately prompts a new line of action into being.

For months Erik has operated under a shroud of secrecy, discussing his plans for escape with no one except those who are included in the mission, and though Charles has been part of the plot all along he doesn't know it- not until the point when the truth between them is finally revealed, in more ways than one. Stars pass by outside the window of Erik's quarters as he finally tells Charles of the plan to escape, as he later removes the collar from around Charles’ neck, as he leans in to kiss Charles for the first time since the initial failed attempt. The stars are in Charles' eyes too as they regard each other- sparks of celestial wonder amidst deep blue, drawing Erik into their depths. Erik’s breath is held as he waits for rebuttal, stolen from his lungs as if sucked into the abyss of space, but in the moment when Charles leans in and their mouths meet everything is pure and good and right for the first time, and Erik can breathe again.

 

That same breath of Erik's is held again in another time, another place- lungs constricting at the thought of losing something precious, something that never seemed necessary until mere months ago, but now something that Erik cannot live without. As Erik lies in bed he listens to the sound of rain thrumming against the windowpane, providing a continual low hum of background noise that is broken only by an occasional whimpered mumble- a sound that draws deep sentiment from Erik's heart as he turns to the side to regard the cause.

Bathed in the soft glow of moonlight is Erik's whole universe- something more important than all the stars and planets Erik could ever name; his heart and his home. Another mumble leaves Charles’ lips as his brow draws together in a frown, his limbs tensing as if every fibre of his being is actively recoiling from something- and in his mind Erik knows Charles is doing exactly that. For weeks now Erik has laid beside Charles each night and has watched as Charles has battled the demons that plague his unconscious thoughts- present even after escaping Shaw's clutches, after returning home, after settling back into some semblance of a normal life. The things that happened to Charles during his time on the prison ship have irrevocably changed him, and though Erik wishes desperately that he could find a way to make everything better, he knows that all he can really do is be patient.

As Charles begins to writhe more frantically Erik edges closer to him, gazing down at Charles' beautiful face- at the line of his lashes dark against his freckled cheek, like the curve of the moon against a starry sky. Charles looks undeniably pained and Erik hates it- hates that anyone has ever hurt Charles, hates all the things that happened that Erik could not prevent, and part of him wonders for a moment if everything would just have been better had Charles never boarded that fateful ship. If Erik could go back he knows he would spare Charles every moment, even if the thought of never having met Charles is so painful it makes Erik feel rather like a black hole has just opened up where his heart once was. But there is little point dwelling on what could of been- as futile as trying to clutch the very stars from the sky- and as such Erik knows there is more that can be attained by seizing what is within grasp.

Erik reaches out for Charles and places his hand flat against Charles' chest, tracing the fragile bones there that barely mask the hammering beneath. Charles' ribcage feels rather like it contains some trapped, frightened bird that is desperate to be free, and all Erik wants is to protect it; to keep it safe and shield it always. It has been Erik’s sole purpose in life for months now and every night he feels like he is failing, because every night he has to lie there and watch the man he loves writhe in anguish, knowing there is little he can do to protect from the ghost of bad dreams.

“Liebling...”

Charles' whimpered moans become more panicked as Erik leans over and presses his mouth to Charles' cheek, placing a solemn kiss there and tasting salt on his lips. The front of Charles’ t-shirt is damp with sweat and his breaths are coming out short and fast, and though it is bitingly cold outside the air between them is dense and hot, as if the fevered dreams from Charles’ mind are seeping out into the space around his body. Worse still, Erik can sense the onset of fractured images beginning to flit through his own mind; stolen sight that Erik does not want but cannot shy away from, panicked memories forced out from Charles’ frightened thoughts.

“Charles...” Erik murmurs. “Mein Geliebter- wake up, come back to me...”

Shaw's face is a spectre, looming large in Erik's thoughts as he seizes Charles' shoulder and squeezes firmly, beginning to shake him after a moment when Charles still does not rouse. After so many weeks Erik has become accustomed to losing sleep on account of Charles’ nightmares but he does not mind. In truth, Erik knows he would give up every second of sleep he could ever attain just to comfort Charles.

“You're safe, Liebling... You're safe now...”

It takes longer than Erik would like- endless seconds passing by during which Erik simply lies there next to Charles, rubbing the palm of his hand against Charles’ chest as he whispers softly to him. After what feels like an age Charles’ eyes finally snap open as he exhales a juddering breath, his hands flying out to grasp at Erik's shirt, clinging on desperately for a moment like he fears he is falling, until his eyes focus on Erik and he realises he has already been caught.

“Erik...” Charles mumbles, his voice coming out hoarse and scratchy. “Gosh, I'm sorry. I was... I was somewhere else in my head. I didn't hurt you, did I?”

Erik shakes his head. “No, Liebling- I'm fine. Are you alright?”

The question is entirely rhetorical because Erik already knows the answer, and so in lieu of any additional words Erik simply pulls Charles closer, so that Charles is sprawled comfortably across his body. Shadows track across the ceiling as Erik holds Charles, as he presses his face into Charles’ hair and inhales his scent, as Charles’ heart continues to thrum erratically where it is pressed against Erik’s chest. After some time though Charles’ pulse begins to decrease, his breathing slowly returns to normal, and as Erik tilts his head down he takes in the soft sigh Charles gives out, existing in unison, finding peace.

Every night has ended in the same way for weeks now, but though there isn't a single evening Erik does not spend with Charles in his arms, their unity only ever goes so far. It has been months since they last slept together- the sight of Charles' face when he comes something Erik only ever sees in his memories- and though the absence of intimacy is often difficult to handle Erik knows he can live with it. At first it was physical distance that kept them apart, as for weeks after Charles returned home Erik was unable to go to him, forced to stay away until the moment when Erik's name was finally cleared and he was no longer wanted by the authorities. Now though it is something else that keeps them apart, that prompts Erik to seek seclusion in the bathroom any time he is achingly hard from mere thoughts of Charles, because although Erik wants Charles _so_ desperately, he has a very important reason to refrain.

Coerced by Shaw's evil whims, Charles and Erik slept together countless times whilst they were on the prison ship, but only two of the encounters were actually of Charles' choice. Consequently touching Charles now comes in the form of holding each other, of trailing fingertips across Charles' soft skin as he murmurs happily, of placing gentle kisses to any part of him that is granted without expectation of anything in return. Erik knows he would live ten lifetimes of abstinence and not complain as long as he can be with Charles, finding he attains all he needs from little more than in-depth conversations, chess games, and the gentle ebb and flow of Charles' breathing as they hold each other before they go to sleep each night. Wanting anything more than that seems too much to ask when Charles has already given so much, and Erik would never again wish to take something from Charles that he isn't willing to offer.

Wanting is for the weak; those made of wanton flesh and fragile hearts, and Erik has spent a lifetime learning how to be strong. He does not expect more from Charles as he lies there holding him, trailing his fingers up and down the length of Charles’ spine, feeling him shiver in recognition, inhaling the sweet scent of his skin. Erik does not expect but nevertheless he can't help but harbour hope, and as such when Charles emits a mumbled kind of moan and presses his face into Erik's neck the reactive arousal that begins to slowly pool in the pit of Erik's stomach is instantaneous, prompting his cock into hardening within seconds. Immediately Charles squirms a little in response which only draws him closer into the lines of Erik’s body, and Erik inhales a shaky breath as he prepares to withdraw.

“Es tut mir leid...” Erik murmurs, unwinding his arms from Charles' body to give Charles the freedom to move away, if he so wishes.

The apology is not just for Erik's obvious need now, it is for every time he is forced to ask himself: _“Should I have done more? Could I have saved him from all of this?”_ No answers are forthcoming as the rain outside increases in intensity, hammering against the window and matching the frantic thrumming of Erik's heart- no longer lost to sweet serenity with Charles but beset by lustful fervour. After a moment Charles lifts himself up and looks down at Erik, and he looks so sleep rumpled and so adorable that Erik physically aches at how much he wants to kiss him, to caress every part of his body, to make sure he knows he is loved. In truth that is probably the worst part of not being intimate with Charles, because they have slept together countless times and yet they have never once made love, and Erik wants so badly to be with Charles like that, to rock into him in slow, careful motions, drawing the pleasure out of him with each deep thrust until he cannot help but succumb to the bliss. Erik wants it but he will never say it, because sometimes loving someone means giving them what they need, with no expectation of getting what you want in return.

These days their minds are so entwined Erik never has to look far to find Charles there- the tendrils of his telepathy woven through Erik’s mind the same way the love Erik feels has wound its way around his heart. For that reason when Erik sees the flicker of sadness that passes over Charles' face he knows the cause- he knows that Charles has picked up on Erik’s conflicting feelings; the way he does not want to take anything from Charles but craves more nonetheless. Erik would never ask of course, but nevertheless what he covets is written in every action of his body; constellations of desire mapped out by hands that cannot help sliding around Charles’ waist once more to hold him, hoping against all evidence to the contrary that Charles will want more this time. When Charles abruptly pulls away the answer is as forthcoming as it always is, and though Erik cannot help watching Charles wistfully as he wanders over to the adjoining bathroom, he tells himself that he's happy that Charles has most likely gone to get his sleeping pills- because as long as Charles is able to sleep soundly that is really all that matters. But then a few moments later Charles steps back into the bedroom, and when Erik sees what he is holding in his hand he realises this night is unlikely to be like any other they have ever shared before.

The object is ignored at first, because although its presence suggests one thing Erik cannot let himself assume too much, particularly when there's a chance Charles might change his mind at any point- as he is more than entitled to do. For that reason when Charles returns to the bed Erik simply pulls him into his arms once more and kisses him slowly and passionately, the relative silence in the room broken only by the murmured moans each of them gives out as they move together. Charles is hard now- Erik can feel it where Charles' body pressed against his own- and it's a compelling enough reason not to second guess anything as Charles’ hands start to wander, hurrying things towards a progression Erik so desperately wants.

Erik has seen Charles naked on countless occasions and yet it is still the first time. It is the first time Erik has peeled Charles' clothing off slowly, watching in reverence as the waistband of his boxer shorts slides over the point of his freckled hip. It is the first time Erik has listened to the heated little murmur Charles gives out as Erik wraps his hand around Charles' flushed cock, only going so far as to give it a couple of experimental strokes for now. It is the first time Erik has smiled as Charles has sat up and enthusiastically wrapped his arms around Erik’s shoulders, pulling him in for a lingering kiss. It is the first time Erik has lain there on top of Charles, gazing down at his beautiful face, their bodies touching everywhere, knowing that there is no danger of this being the last time.

Telling Charles that he loves him is habitual at this point- as customary as breathing- and consequently there is no surprise in Charles’ expression as Erik says it, only a look that is reciprocal accompanied by those same words said in return. Loving Charles has always meant giving him exactly what he needs and as such Erik is only too happy to follow Charles' lead, moving with him as Charles rolls over so he is lying flat on his belly and Erik takes up position kneeling in-between his spread legs. The bottle of lube that Charles brought back from the bathroom is then handed to Erik, its intended use explicit as Charles lies there with his head angled to the side, his eyes focused on Erik as always. This at least is something Charles has always trusted Erik to do, and as such Charles is the most content Erik has ever seen him as Erik begins the prep- inserting his lubed fingers inside Charles and after a moment twisting them, making Charles moan.

Though Erik listens to Charles on most things he does not on this occasion when Charles says he is ready, wanting to instead spend additional minutes on preparing Charles for sex as he knows it has been a long time. As a result by the time Erik finally removes his fingers Charles is practically _begging_ , his body arched up towards Erik in desperation and his toes curling, his skin flushed and his lower lip red from biting it. As a final act of devotion Erik leans over and kisses Charles then, strokes his hand through Charles' hair as he regards him, and asks him: “Are you sure?” The response, when it comes, is everything Erik has been hoping for but not expecting; confirmation in the form of an old saying Charles once told him was popular among pilots: “As certain as the stars...”

That same feeling of certainty continues to bind them as Erik slowly begins to push his cock inside of Charles, as Charles presses his face into the pillow and groans heatedly- the sound he makes just about the most beautiful thing Erik has ever heard. Erik's legs are shaking as he starts to thrust into Charles because it has been forever and it’s such an incredible feeling to be with Charles like they were before, but in the same time in a way that is completely new. Because this is not some forced coercion on board the prison ship or even a desperate release of tension to express true feelings at last, they are in _their_ home, in _their_ bed, they are together because they want to be- because they love one another- and thus the union is unparalleled; a previously unattained kind of bliss.

When Charles comes the broken moan he gives out is something so beautiful, as is the look on his face as Erik strokes him through it, needing to draw the pleasure out of Charles until he cannot take it any longer. When that moment arrives Erik seeks to withdraw but Charles’ mental command spurs him on, prompting Erik to continue to roll his hips until he is coming too, his arm wrapped around Charles' waist as he buries his face in Charles' neck, his breathing harsh and ragged. It is only a moment that Erik allows himself to lie on top of Charles until sentient thought returns enough for him to pull out and roll to the side, and when he does so the smile Erik sees on Charles' face is more stunning than any sight Erik has ever seen in all the years of his life.

“I've missed you...” Charles whispers, seeming oddly shy in that moment.

Erik leans over and presses a gentle kiss to Charles' forehead, before responding: “I promise I'll never be gone long enough for you to miss me again”.

It's then that Erik realises the rain outside has stopped, and that the first sign of a burgeoning new day can be seen in the form of soft light just beginning to track across the ceiling. That same sense of a new beginning is felt between them too as they lie together- Erik’s fingertips slowly trailing up and down Charles’ spine as Charles' eyes slowly slide shut, as his expression softens into something resembling peace. Like stars sparking into life Charles and Erik's relationship has taken on the form of something new, something that burns bright between them, and Erik can't help but be grateful for everything that has happened in his life to lead him to this moment, because being with Charles now has made it all worth it.

 


End file.
